Posted by Johnnie
Er … kill them? That ought to do it, surely?
Am I being too analytical? I sense that I’m not supposed to look at this too deeply, but simply accept it as something profound. If the guy with the deep voice said it over a trailer, that might help.
Posted by Johnnie
I was in a pub last night (which, apropos of nothing, served the most piss-poor watery excuse for beer that I’ve ever had the misfortune to encounter), and they were playing Christmas carols. Loudly, consistently. The Most Annoying Christmas Tunes In The World Ever 3 on constant loop.
Now, check the timestamp on this post. It’s almost exactly two months till Christmas. If it’s now acceptable to start the relentless Christmas cheer at the end of September, that means I’m going to be forced to listen to Slade for a sixth of my life. That’s too much to ask of any man.
Posted by Johnnie
As a pretty proficient Photoshop user, I’m often called on to touch up or alter an image, sometimes in a minor way and sometimes in a major way (for one of the shots in BloodSpell I had to animate a character’s mouth movement frame by frame, because we forgot to puppeteer it when we took the shot).
I know that image manipulations tools such as Photoshop can have a profound effect on a final image, and I also know just how much work has been done to the images that grace the covers of fashion and celebrity magazines. I sometimes find it difficult to get this across to people, though – if you don’t have years of regular Photoshop use under your belt it’s difficult to comprehend just how much influence you can bring to bear on an image. Finally, I’ve found a perfect example. iWANEX Studio have put several example images online (Flash-based site. Click Portfolio to see the images). Mouse-over the final image and you can see the original shot. Pay attention: this is what celebrities really look like. Greasy, fat and spotty; rather like you and me. The reason Kylie Minogue’s butt is so impossibly pert is because it is, quite literally, impossible. Those buttock cheeks do not exist. They’re no more real than Lara Croft’s funbags.
Posted by Johnnie
It was very satisfying, in a twisted way, to be ranting about Microsoft again the other day. It’s been too long. It was even more satisfying, though, to discover that we won. Stick that in your proprietary codec and smoke it.
The title of the post, by the way, comes from the Q&A session with Microsoft lawyer Brad Smith.
Posted by Johnnie
My book has just been published. Let the reserved and repressed white middle-class celebrations begin! Hurrah!
The title of this post will make no sense to anybody outside of the UK, by the way, so don’t even try.
Apologies to anyone reading this via the Machinifeed, who must by now be thoroughly sick of hearing that Machinima For Dummies has been published. Between us, Hugh and I have announced it on darn near every Machinima site on the net.